


Hands to Yourself

by Sacramental_Wine, thekumquat



Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One)
Genre: Established Relationship, M/M, One-Sided Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-28
Updated: 2013-03-28
Packaged: 2017-12-06 20:04:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,260
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/739583
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sacramental_Wine/pseuds/Sacramental_Wine, https://archiveofourown.org/users/thekumquat/pseuds/thekumquat
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>First Aid kinda has a thing for Wreckers, so he flirts with Whirl. Unfortunately, Whirl is already in a relationship, and Brainstorm doesn't like to share.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Hands to Yourself

**Author's Note:**

> This pairing is pure unadulterated crack -- I don't think Whirl and Brainstorm have even spoken in the comics -- but I hope you'll agree, as my friends and I do, that somehow, someway, they work. After all, love is nothing but finding someone whose crazy matches your own.

Whirl didn't often expect to be approached when he was getting a drink. Something about being a "danger to himself and others". Pfft. Yeah, whatever. Whirl ordered his drink and was ready to, as their resident whack job put it, explore the limits of solitude, when a familiar little bot moved to the seat next to his.

"Hey Whirl, mind if I...?"

Whirl smiled with his optic at First Aid and waved Swerve over. "Nah! Have a seat Digits." First Aid actually laughed and got comfortable.

Perceptor leaned back in his seat, sipping his midgrade thoughtfully. He'd really only come in here to while away the hours while Drift was off arguing with Ultra Magnus about something. It was apparently not tactically important, but solely for the entertainment and emotional fortitude of the men, which meant it required both Drift and Rodimus to tag-team argue Ultra Magnus until he got tired and frustrated and gave them what they want to shut them up.

But then he'd spotted First Aid approach Whirl with a particular look on his face plates. It was one that Perceptor had seen before. First Aid had been wearing it when he'd first, quietly, propositioned Perceptor. (Perceptor had said no and explained the situation; three days later, First Aid came back and said he was open to a threesome, at which point Perceptor had kicked him out of the science wing as politely as possible.)

"I haven't seen you in the med bay in a while. You almost have me believing that you have the ability to take care of yourself." First Aid smiled behind his mask.

"Aww you been thinkin' of me." Whirl patted First Aid on the back and his optic grinned. "See, I keep tellin' people I can be likable once ya get to know me intimately." Whirl was teasing, flirting, but he had been told to "act like himself it's not like we're dating, PRIMUS" so that's exactly what he decided to do.

"What can I say?" First Aid almost leaned into Whirl's claw. "You leave something of a lasting impression."

"If you're talkin' about the dents, I apologized Digits."

They both laughed and people stared. Were they missing something?

Perceptor arched an optic ridge.

Interesting.

It didn't take a genius to put the details together, and Perceptor was a genius, if he did say so himself.

Whirl and First Aid had slept together, some time ago, if Perceptor was to judge. And now First Aid wanted to do it again.

There was just one teeny tiny problem with that – Brainstorm and Whirl were, for lack of a better word, intimate, and had been for a few months now. And while Perceptor didn’t know the specifics of their relationship, he _did_ know Brainstorm, and he knew he was a jealous, conniving bastard, and hardly the type to be even remotely all right with his lover being flirted with by someone else.  

"Speaking of dents," First Aid took a deep drink of his cube and looked back at Whirl, "I really have been thinking about you lately."

Was First Aid coming on to him? "Are you coming on to me?" Nice job being subtle Whirl, high five yourself.

First Aid laughed. "Well, yeah. Sorry if I'm being a little forward but I really did have a great time and have been trying to get up the courage to ask to be...how did you put it? Wrecked again."

Whirl, for once, felt that he had no words. What answer was least likely to make Brainstorm melt him with something horrible?

The door to Swerve's bar opened. Perceptor couldn't help but feel his spark leap in his chest as Brainstorm skulked in. Oh, sometimes dreams did come true, and you could get perfect moments in life. Perceptor thought he might put this one above graduating from university and just below when he and Drift got together (but only just).

Perceptor stood and neatly intercepted Brainstorm before he could spot the copter.

"Brainstorm," he said with a smile. "Are you here with anyone? No? Great, why don't you come sit with me." He dragged a bewildered Brainstorm over to a table and sat him so Whirl was just out of sight, but could easily be brought into sight with a little leaning. And Perceptor could keep an eye on Brainstorm's face.

This was going to be perfect.

"Well, what do you say? We had fun last time, right?" First Aid, being a bit of a light weight in the drinking department and very determined, scooted closer and put a hand on Whirl's knee joint.

"Uh well yeah of course we did..." Whirl debated picking the servo off his knee but that would be way too obvious. "One hell of a "welcome to the crew" party, that's for sure! But uh..."

"Are you busy then? We could try to find a time that works for both of us."

"Why do you want to have drinks with me? You never want to have drinks with me." Brainstorm grouched, slumping in his seat and trying oh-so-casually to scope out the surrounding area. Perceptor once again muffled a smirk.

"Well, I don't have anyone else to sit with. And I had a delightful bit of gossip I'd like to share with someone I know can keep a secret."

Brainstorm perked up at that. He liked to think he could be trusted, and he was incredibly nosy. Perceptor knew that very well.

Brainstorm leaned forward.

"Yeah? What?"

"Lean this way, and look left, casually."

Brainstorm did so, and Perceptor watched with malicious glee as his optics went wide.

"I think First Aid has a thing for Whirl," he said, somewhat unnecessarily.

Whirl gently used his claws to pick First Aid's servos up. "Well uh, ya see, I've uh kinda got a previous engagement." There that should...

The medic, optics dim behind his visor, leaned in a bit closer. "That's okay, you know I wouldn't mind a visit on one of my shifts. Preferably one without Ratchet around..."

Whirl couldn't help wincing. First Aid laughed. "Laugh all you like, but it took me weeks to get the wrench outta my cock pit."

"I would have helped."

Whirl was running out of excuses slowly. Any that didn't seem suspicious anyway. His optic darted around the room for an escape.

Perceptor watched as Whirl took First Aid's servos in his own. There was too much noise to hear what they were saying from where he and Brainstorm were sitting.

"Very affectionate, aren’t they?" Perceptor said, noting with glee the way Brainstorm's servo-tips were digging little gouges into the table. "Not romantic, but certainly a conventional date."

"They might not be dating. It...it could just be a friendly outing."

Perceptor was amazed at how calm Brainstorm sounded.

"Well, that's what I thought, until I heard First Aid mention dents, and how long it took to get them out of plating."

Brainstorm snarled, seemingly unaware that he even made the noise. Mechs seated nearby edged away, nervously. Perceptor gloated internally.

First Aid took his servos back and moved his chair closer. "Well we know I've been thinking about you, ever spare me a thought?" He put his helm on Whirl's arm and looked up at him.

Whirl tried as subtly as possible to get some distance. "Uh, I mean, ya know, of course, but been busy lately. Ya know, Magnus' to annoy and what not. Aliens ta beat up for the good of the cause..." Oh scrap, wait wasn't...?

"Really?!" First Aid's optics brightened and he leaned close again, while Whirl tried to pull away, "tell me everything!"

Right. First Aid had a tough guy fetish. Him and his little “thing” for Wreckers were what got him laid in the first place. Sometimes Whirl wished he listened to that little part of his processor that said “no don’t!” just before he did stuff.

"Really, I think it's great," Perceptor said. "It's nice that Whirl can finally find someone attracted to him despite his personality. It'd do him some good to be in a _proper_ relationship." He made sure to put emphasis on the right word, just to see Brainstorm twitch.

"It's not a _real_ relationship. They _can’t_ be dating."

"Oh?" Perceptor feigned surprise. "Whyever not?"

"Because he's... because... because..." Perceptor watched with glee at Brainstorm's mental flailing as he tried to come up with a reason that wasn't 'because I'm fragging him on my boss' desk'. "Because they're not even good together! And First Aid's got that creepy Wrecker fetish! He's just... objectifying him!"

It was astounding, the hypocritical levels people could sink to.

"I'd love to, really, ya know how much I love sharin' and what not but uh...well I got knocked in the head and I'm havin' problems rememberin'?" Whirl shrugged hopelessly. He did not, however, notice his tactical error.

"Oh!" Right...Medic...Scraaaaaap. First Aid's servos shot up to his helm and the little medic stood on his chair to get a closer look. "Here, let me see if I can fix it!" A drunk medic and _whoa_ , where was that servo going?

"I'm sure it's fine doc..."

"Ratchet would have my T-cog if I didn't check it."

Perceptor sighed, dramatically.

"See? What a nice couple they must make." He snagged a cube from Swerve's tray as he passed. Swerve kept cubes the old Cybertronian way, with thin membranes over the tops to keep the energon from spilling. They kept the energon inside, but the membranes could easily be broken with a servo.

Or by blunt force.

He nudged the unopened cube closer to Brainstorm's servo.

"I can't think of the last time Whirl must have gotten any affection. And First Aid seems very amorous. It seems like a perfect match."

Nudge nudge nudge.

 

Whirl's claws hovered awkwardly, torn between removing First Aid and keeping him steady. Is this what he made people feel like? Maybe he should rethink his choices. He let out an undignified squeak when First Aid moved to kneel between his legs on Whirl’s stool.

"Well it doesn't look too bad, maybe I should just kiss it better and you take the rest of the afternoon for bed rest. Doctor's orders." First Aid clicked open his mask and put a kiss on Whirl's helm which spurred the larger bot to flail wildly in confusion.

Why in the Pit wasn't this happening a few weeks ago? "Uh really Digits, I'm uh fine just tired and ya know maybe not available to lend a claw but you could totally find someone to tap that aft of yours and..."

"Oh look at that--" Perceptor didn't get anything out of his mouth before Brainstorm let out a strangled, barely audible scream of rage, grabbed the unopened cube and flung it at the canoodling pseudo-couple.

Just as Perceptor hoped, the membrane held until it hit Whirl, whereupon it broke, and coated the copter and the medic with an entire cubeful of energon.

"Well," he remarked as blandly as possible to the heavily venting Brainstorm. "That was...explosive."

Whirl was caught by surprise and fell backwards off the stool. "Found my only weakness! Energon cubes!" He brought a claw up and was way too confused to even be angry. "I think I saw a racy vid like this once but it had two femmes wrestlin'."

First Aid had fallen the other way, also covered in energon and looked around. "Any idea what happened?"

Swerve yelled from behind the bar. "Okay who threw that? Skids ain't here so someone has to pipe up!"

" _Really_ , Brainstorm, was that necessary?" Perceptor said just loud enough to ensure the entire bar heard it.

Brainstorm, still venting loud enough that it could be heard quite clearly, snarled " _yes_ ", glaring daggers at Whirl. Or First Aid. Or both.

Probably both.

"To answer any questions." Whirl rubbed at his helm sheepishly. "That's uh...my previous engagement Digits." Whirl tried to shake himself off a bit but didn't get right to his pedes. "I need to go to the washrack. I smell like a bar."

Swerve stared at Brainstorm and then at Whirl and then at Brainstorm again. "No fragging way."

First Aid looked very confused. "Previous engagement?" He looked up at Brainstorm, still a bit buzzed.

Brainstorm stormed out of the bar, practically steaming with rage. Perceptor was almost giddy with delight. This was turning out better than he could have hoped.

Oh, where was Rewind when you needed him?

Whirl looked around and heaved a big ex-vent before getting to his pedes. "Well I'd better go cheer him up!" He said cheerfully, dripping all the way out the door to catch up with his very, very angry lover.

First Aid looked around and stood. "I feel like I'm missing something..."

Perceptor barely spared first Aid a glance before he darted out a side door, down the corridor to the main hallway, where he crouched in wait for the fireworks to begin.

Part of him realized this was reaching crazy stalker territory, but Drift wasn't there to talk him down, and he'd found transfluid (that wasn't his or Drift's) on his desk four times and that was only that he knew of! He'd taken to sanitizing every inch of his desk at the beginning of each day, just to be safe! It was seriously beginning to interfere with his work, and he felt a little voyeuristic revenge wasn’t too much to ask for.

Whirl managed to catch up to Brainstorm and took the scientist's arm. "Thanks for getting me outta that, dummy. I needed a serious hand. Tryin' to be all casual is kinda hard when minibots are throwing themselves around like that." Energon had started to dry on Whirl's chassis.

Brainstorm wrenched his arm free.

"Don't touch me you, you oversized fan belt!"

Perceptor rolled his eyes. Apparently, being mad only made Brainstorm _worse_ at insults.

Whirl had the gall to look confused. "Uh, you upset about somethin'? Percy bug ya in the lab today?" Whirl cocked his helm to the right and scratched at his shoulder absently.

"PER- YOU- HOW-" Brainstorm took a deep breath. "You think you can just... casually act your way out of this? After what you did? ‘Thanks for rescuing me', what a load of scrap!"

"Well I meant it." Whirl shrugged. "I was tryin' ta get out of it without basically doing what ya told me not to and actin' "weird". As if I ever do." Whirl's claw spun around and clicked. "What did I do? If this is about the flame retardant foam in Chromedome's chest cavity I swear it was there before I got there."

"You think I believe that? I saw him, getting his hands all over you! You coulda done anything to make him stop and you just let him get all handsy like it's no big deal! Like, like you liked it! You think I couldn't tell?"

Perceptor leaned back against the wall. Oh, this was just too good.

 

"You really think me throwin' him off and decreeing "hey I gotta go, my berth mate is calling" woulda been me acting normal in that situation?" Whirl rolled his optic. "You told me ta act natural dummy. You're the one whose embarrassed about our situation."

"Yeah! Act natural, not, not, let him put his hands all over you! I told you to act natural, not frag around behind my back! I expected you to be subtle about getting away! Or unsubtle! You trying to tell me you can't scare off one measly medic? Puh-lease!"

Whirl suddenly started growling. "I fragged First Aid once, about a year ago, since you're so damned curious. Weirdly enough we started bein friends after that. So excuse me if, for once, I wanted ta keep a friend AND make my stupid boyfriend happy!" He folded his arms and started clicking his claws on his plating. Then something clicked, something glorious and wonderful and it lightened his mood right up.

"Are you... _jealous_ , dummy?"

"Jealous!" A bout of static shrieked out of Brainstorm's vocalizor, so severe Perceptor briefly wondered if the bot was having an attack of some sort. "ME?" He managed to get out at last. "Don't be _ridiculous_! Why would I be jealous of some creepy, slutty weirdo with a thing for Wreckers! I just want him to keep his hands to himself, that's. All."

"Well if ya ain't jealous," Primus even Whirl's voice was smiling, "then why did him touchin' me bother ya so bad? Not like it bothers ya when  anyone else touches me. At least, not mad enough ta get me all dirty." Whirl's optic went half-lidded and he looked entirely too smug for not having a face.

"Sh-shut up! It does so bother me when other people touch-- wait, I mean. Scrap, that's not what I meant! I just mean... nobody else got as far as he did, so I didn't have to get... wait, no. I mean... I meant... He was... Oh shut up! You should have stopped him anyway!"

Perceptor covered his mouth with his hand, trying desperately to stop his giggles. This was better than he ever could have expected.

"I really was tryin' dummy." Whirl moved in a little closer. "Contrary to what you're thinkin' I'm a one mech kinda Wrecker, no worries there." Whirl tried so hard not to tell Brainstorm how cute he was when he was angry and flustered. "So ah, you still mad at me?"

"Of course I'm mad at you, you idiot! And I don't even remotely believe you about you trying, so you can just, just stop looking at me like that and stay over there because I am NOT happy with you right now, understand?"

"You're so hot when you're mad, nerd." Whirl growled out. "Also hot when you're all possessive like that. Well most of the time actually. Frag it." Whirl kept trailing his optic over Brainstorm lecherously. "Ya know, I couldn't stray if I wanted to, you'a melted me into a puddle by now if you really thought I would."

Drift was coming around a corner and saw Perceptor crouched in hiding. He knelt behind his mate as stealthily as he could and whispered, "What are we hiding from?"

Perceptor jumped, and only just managed to silence the yelp. He glared at Drift, then leaned in a whispered a quick summary of the situation. Which didn't amount to much more than "Brainstorm make an idiot of himself about his relationship with Whirl." He frowned. It had sounded so much less petty in his head.

"Melt into a puddle? What the hell does that mean?" Brainstorm bristled. "You think I'm sooo dependent on you? You think I _need_ you or something? You think I couldn't possibly stand to live without you or something? You think I'd be absolutely crushed if you cheated on me, like I'd be broken sparked and waste away and--" He stopped himself. "Because I wouldn't! I wouldn't even care!"

Drift looked at Perceptor with an odd look before shock came over his face. "Brainstorm and...and... _Whirl_?" Drift hid a snicker. "I was wondering when he was going to get over his crush on you."

Perceptor blinked several times.

"Crush on me?" he hissed. "What do you mean, crush on me?!"

"Well what I meant was that you woulda poured acid on me while I was recharging but..." Whirl leaned even closer. "I'm likin' this whole needin' me thing." He chuckled. "You're fragging cute when you're forgettin' ta be a genius because I melt your brain."

“Oh.” Brainstorm deflated, then rose up again, sputtered angrily. "Well, well I don't need you! And I'm not forgetting to be a genius! I'm always a genius! I'm the smartest mech on this whole ship! You're just some jumped up circuit cruncher too big for his plating! And I DON'T need you! For anything!" He cast around for something else to say. "I, I _use_ you! I get an overload from you and that's it! I wouldn't even care if you went to interface with First Aid!"

Whirl moved closer again and revved his engine. "You know you need me nerd. No one makes ya feel like I do." He closed the distance slowly. "And if ya didn't care, if ya don't care why are you so fragged off?"

"What? Why didn't you tell me? How did I not notice?" Hm, now that _was_ disappointing. Jealous Drift sounded like a very exciting Drift indeed. "Just, er... _how_ jealous, would you say, exactly?"

Brainstorm snorted.

"Puhlease, I am NOT fragged off. You're a berthmate, not my bondmate. I mean, why would I want to bond with someone who couldn't even kiss me properly?"

Perceptor's jaw dropped. He and Drift shared a look of horror. Of all the things for Brainstorm to bring up, of all the hits to take, THAT was the one he picked? It was worse than a low blow, it was the lowest possible blow.

Whirl tensed and stepped back.

 " _Right,_ " he said. The copter nodded and started walking down the hallway. "Whateva. I have a shift to go to anyway. See ya around Brainstorm." He waved over his shoulders and his roters drooped slightly.

Drift looked both horrified and amazed. How had Whirl not lost his mind completely at that? He actually could feel the weird aura of rejection radiating off of Whirl.

"B-But I d...I w..." Brainstorm stood staring after Whirl, battling between pride and the need to apologize because, wow, Brainstorm, way to fuck up your one good thing, way to fuck it up hard. He twisted his servos together. “I didn't _mean_ it...." he said, wretchedly.

Perceptor shook his head. Unbelievable. Really, truly unbelievable.

"Should we do something?" he asked. He didn’t care much for Brainstorm, but it was sort of his fault that all this had happened. Surely they should at least ask.

Drift had a bit of the good old white knight syndrome. Something that was common knowledge so once the word 'help' came up Drift stood and took in a deep vent. "We should attempt to help."

Perceptor stepped out into the open and reset his vocalizor noisily.

"Hello, Brainstorm. Is everything alright?"

Brainstorm glared miserably at him.

"Oh, don't even try and pretend you weren't listening," he snapped. "You heard exactly what I said." His shoulders slumped. "Guess I should be glad it lasted as long as it did. They usually don't stick around that long."

Drift gave Brainstorm a smile. "Maybe you should go after him and apologize? He doesn't actually have a shift." Oh Drift, silly air-headed Drift who believes in the power of love, stop talking. "If this really means that much to you, you shouldn't let it go so quickly. We all mess up at some point."

Brainstorm sneered at him. "Yeah, _right_. Do you know what happened to the last mech that made fun of his face?"

"But he didn't do that to you." It had taken days to pick the all the pieces of chair out of the walls. And Perceptor still couldn't look at crude oil the same way. "He just walked away. That has to mean something."

"No it won't! He'll never talk to me again because I've ruined everything and I'm going to die alone and unloved!"

Drift tilted his helm in confusion at the dramatics. "I'm not sure I'm clear on this whole thing." He waved a servo in a circle. "Whirl's kept your relationship a secret at your request it seems, didn't lose every logic circuit at you when you mentioned the uh...taboo subject, and it seems from what I saw, which I'll admit isn't much, he was legitimately trying to make you happy. Whirl doesn't make people happy. Whirl causes chaos. You seem to be immune. That speaks volumes to me." Drift put a servo on Brainstorm's shoulder. "Would it be so bad to give it a try before something explodes?"

"But... but what if he hates me now?"

'But what if he doesn't?" Perceptor asked, gently.

'But what if he does?"

"You don't know that."

"But what if he does?"

"You have to at least try."

"But what if he does?"

"It'd be worth it to at least attempt to go talk to him. We're scientists, right? We never state a fact without proving the hypothesis through trial and error."

There was a short pause.

"Yeah, but what if he hates me?"

Perceptor gave Drift a look that said simultaneously 'I love you and everything you are in this moment solely because you are not Brainstorm' and 'if you don't use your zen magic to make this stop I will set him on fire'.

It was a very complex look.

Drift was fluent in Perceptor, which was lucky for everyone involved.

"Brainstorm, I don't really think he has it in him to hate you." Drift tried at a comforting smile, using the same tone he used on Roddy when 'MAGNUS DOESN'T LOVE MEEEEE' became a topic of conversation. "I'm sure it will turn out okay. I get good vibes from this."

Brainstorm sniffled a bit.

“Are you sure?"

" _Positive_." Perceptor said. Then he grabbed Brainstorm by the shoulders and began to push him down the hallway in the direction Whirl had been going. Brainstorm tried to dig his heels in, but Perceptor could not be deterred. "Perhaps it would help if Drift and I came with you. For moral support, of course." He kept an iron grip on Brainstorm's shoulders until they could hear Whirl's voice arguing with Cyclonus.

Drift followed and congratulated himself on the theory that the "soothing tone" actually seemed to work.

 

Whirl was halfway through dismantling the door to Cyclonus' quarters before said purple flyer appeared behind him. "If you stash corpses in my room I swear to Primus they won't find your body."

"Look I was tryin' ta fix it!"

"Then why are there pieces of the door painted bright green and ALL OVER THE HALLWAY WHIRL?!"

"Well if you're not gonna appreciate my talents..." and Whirl dumped the bucket of neon green paint over Cyclonus' helm. He giggled madly. "Green's your color."

"WHIRL I-"

"Whoaaaa!" Drift put himself between the two, "we need to all just take a calming breath right now and find our centers."

Whirl and Cyclonus shared a look, and smeared green paint over Drift's front. The Ex-Con glared and picked up a wad of paint. "It's on."

"BEFORE WE START A PAINT WAR,” Perceptor announced loudly, shoving Brainstorm (who would rather be deactivated than be where he was right now) out into the open.”Whirl, Brainstorm has something important to say to you."

Brainstorm stared at his feet and mumbled something unintelligible.

"Brainstorm, perhaps you would like to say it a little bit louder so he can actually hear you."

More mumbling. Brainstorm wondered what the chances were he would just spontaneously die of embarassment.

And shame. Can't forget the shame.

Whirl stared at Brainstorm openly, still hurt and spark broken and covered in paint and kind of hungry. Was Brainstorm blushing? Awww!

Drift and Cyclonus were looking at each other, poised to start up the war if they had to. But they were both far too curious to ruin the moment juuuuust yet.

"Brainstorm. A little louder, if you please." Then Perceptor leaned down and hissed “If you don't apologize in the next ten seconds I am banning you from the lab AND telling Ultra Magnus EXACTLY how Whirl got the laser pen."

"I'm sorry." Brainstorm said, loudly. Then, in a quieter, mumbly, but still audible voice, he said "about... about the thing. I said. And the energon throwing. And yelling at you. But...but mostly about the thing."

There was a tense moment where Drift and Cyclonus and Whirl all just stared at Brainstorm until the copter broke into a happy titter and moved closer to Brainstorm.

"Aw, dummy. I knew ya couldn't stay away long!" Whirl's optic grinned in malicious glee when he put a claw on Brainstorm's hip and saw a green claw print. "But you gotta kiss me and prooooove it."

"What! No! I'm not--" He looked desperately at Perceptor, who managed to keep a stern face, despite cackling with delight deep inside. Brainstorm groaned. "FINE." He jerked forward and pecked the side of Whirl's face. "There. Satisfied? And get off, you're getting paint everywhere."

Whirl pushed forward and a surge of static connected the place where his mouth once was to Brainstorm's mouth. He sent out little pulses of electricity until he was satisfied with the thrum. "Mmmm, yeah, I think I can let it pass this time. And I totally CAN kiss it's just...different."

Drift snickered a bit at Brainstorm's expression. It was kind of perfect.

Brainstorm made a noise that was more like a slurred collection of syllables and some static. But it was a happy noise, and he clung to Whirl with shaky servos.

"There," Perceptor said. "Is everyone happy now? No more fighting? Everything as it should be?" It wasn't exactly what he'd been hoping for, but it was still great.

Whirl chuckled and held his arms out. "I thought you wanted me offa ya, nerd." His optic dimmed and his engine revved.

Drift raised his hand. "I'm happy, we should probably go...I need to buff this out."

Perceptor slipped his hand into Drift's and smiled.

"Well then, let's go do that." He sighed. "Someone should probably go explain what's going on to First Aid."

Drift squeezed his servo. "Wait, tell him why?"

Perceptor sighed, happily. "Oh, it's a long story. I really do wish Rewind had been there."

Cyclonus growled at them all. "Excuse me? My door needs to be fixed, Whirl!"

"Do ya really want me to be doin' the fixing?"

"...I'll call Hoist."

Brainstorm cooed something, optics dim, and seemed to be doing his best to crawl onto Whirl and cling. He tangled his fingers into wires and nibbled delicately at Whirl’s shoulder plating.

"I think someone found their new favorite thing. Come on dummy, talk nerdy to me." Whirl chuckled and put an arm around Brainstorm quickly. "Need somethin'?"

"Mm, I need you to take me someplace where I can pop my panels, and then I need you to do that again. And again. And again..." Brainstorm's voice trailed off as he buried his faceplates into Whirl's neck. "And next time someone gets handsy." Brainstorm took a second to drag his high functions back into, well, function, and glared at Whirl, optics to optic. "You tell ‘em to back off before your boyfriend gets the acid out."

"Boyfriend eh?" Whirl's optic brightened considerably and he placed another static-kiss on Brainstorm's mouth. "I like the sound a that."

"That's lovely and all but really I'd like to go into my quarters." Cyclonus tapped his pede impatiently since Whirl was blocking the door.

"Come back in two...make that three and a half hours." Whirl dragged Brainstorm into Cyclonus' quarters and picked a wall.

Cyclonus dreaded calling Tailgate to let him know but it was that or go in there...Tailgate it was.

Inside Cyclonus’ room, Brainstorm and Whirl were busy remembering why they put up with each other. Elsewhere, Perceptor and Drift shared a moment of love. And in a few minutes, in the bar, Cyclonus would tell Tailgate why they were going to deep clean and disinfect every inch of their room in a few hours. All was, for the most part, right in the universe. 

 

 


End file.
